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By LONN PHILLIPS SULLIVAN
We were somewhere around Baton Rouge when the drugs began to take hold.....that drug is LSU Football and it was pumping into my veins at a rate of 20 mililoads per liter of blood...which meant the car was accelerating ever faster as the shape-shifting began....a vision quest, a rhapsody of dreams all the way down the ribbon highway to the emerald city in the sky........a place the forsaken angels called Las Vegas.
The desert has its own prehistoric stories....howling hills against a backdrop of infinite night, telling tales of bodies buried among its skeletal shrubbery, even the moon out here will fry your skull with memories you never bore witness.....dreams you never set breath upon....and it is in this setting, somewhere electric on the dark side of this orbit, where the show begins....the curtain is raised...the windshield cannot contain our astronautical leap of faith.....and the lights go down....
Here we are....another campaign is just around the bend...like melting blotter paper on the tongue, you can feel yourself immerse into the very tapestry of college football....the decadent pagan pageantry, drunken outbursts of revelry, renegade naked prophets proclaiming doom, and wanton bloodlust among the crowds............this is college football in 2024, this is the SEC, an out of control hydra with more layers & tentacles than a fire-breathing Hillary Clinton.......this is our & now your wild, often savage, untamed Odyssey of LSU Erotica unforeseen by man, woman or babe, untouched by human hand...forged as a monolith from the very stone where the first tablets of rock formed Tiger Stadium...born up outta the same mud of these Louisiana forefathers who blazed this trail.....a path we must take....a trip we must endeavor....a call to adventure as primal as any impulse still undisturbed by machine's cold, alien grasp.....
But out in Vegas, where the Old Testament Wild West laws of bartered blood & bone still reign supreme, there are different rules......anything and anyone can happen or be happening at any one time all in the same vortex of humanity's fragile frame.....wait, was that a naked Dabo Swinney berating a casino clerk about his missing sandal??? Images of a pregnant Kirby Smart fill my mind........Coach O arm in arm with two blondes, headed for the deluxe Mike Tyson suite.........WAFB's Jacques Doucet interviewing Sammy Hagar in the lobby.......such are the deeds being consecrated here....
.....in Vegas, there are no rules....
....one moment you're throwing Zach Braff threw a window in drunken, amyl nitrate-assisted fun, the next you're being robbed of your kidneys next to lonely garbage cans in the back alley of a North Las Vegas strip mall.......(avoid North Las Vegas AT ALL COSTS)......at any moment, the rug can be pulled right out from under you...you can go from Nicolas Cage coke-raging with Vince Neil to an acid party at the Sphere alongside freaks fiending for Dead & Co, or your teeth being forcibly removed by the piss-stained fingers of a meth head claiming to be "a skinwalker".......all by the luck of the draw, the luck you make, the chances you take, much like LSU vs USC itself, there will be no winners, only survivors and the plundered, a broken assembly of the defeated...left in the ashes of their conqueror's wake.
The time is now.....the place is here...buy the ticket, take the ride.
9/1
LSU vs USC
(Allegiant Stadium, Las Vegas)
LSU start Year III under Brian Kelly with another Sunday LSU opener on Labor Day weekend @ a neutral site, this time facing off against Lincoln Riley's USC in Las Vegas for what should be a tasty season kickoff....the eyes of the world upon LSU Football once again.
It was a game Riley tried everything to duck, attempting damn near anything legally possible to get this bout vs LSU canceled or rescheduled for years later, all to no avail....now, just like his USC squad, Riley is seen as soft by many national fans & media analysts......after all, doesn't every team personify their Head Coach???
Regardless of questions concerning Lincoln Riley's soft finesse stereotypes, LSU actually don't have much of a leg to stand on as far as bragadoccio ahead of this season opener....in fact, LSU hold an altogether blood-curdling opening week record over recent years:
Kelly's Tigers currently endure a historic streak of four straight Week 1 defeats (2 at the end of 2019 title-winning Head Coach Ed Orgeron's tenure, and now consecutive losses under current frontman Brian Kelly).
Losing their last 4 openers, routinely embarrassed (or blown out) by each opponent, suffering season ending injuries among other negative seismic events, LSU shocked their scores of hyped fans with disgraceful defensive displays, amateur special teams errors (a cornerstone of 2022 & 2023 losses vs Florida State), and offensive ineptitude during every opener since Joe Burrow left for the NFL.
Starting in September 2020, LSU lost to the late Mike Leach's Mississippi State by 10 at home (Corey Raymond's Derek Stingley-less secondary giving up nearly 700 passing yards in Leach's SEC coaching debut), then suffered a major meltdown @ the Rose Bowl vs Chip Kelly's UCLA to start Ed Orgeron's final season, followed by heart wrenching defeats to Florida State over back to back years, allowing 38+ points during 3 of those defeats, including last year's blowout beat down at the hands of FSU.
Still, the Tigers carved out multiple chances to win those games in every one of those 4 losses, only to waste offensive opportunities, hand the other team the ball on special teams, or proving to be incapable defensively........
.....so, in 2024, with a new defensive coaching staff full of top assistants, an offense poised for a high octane campaign yet again, and a deep roster featuring many of the same players who were part of two or even three of LSU's four straight opening week defeats, what will we see this time vs USC???
Will the trend continue for a 5th straight opener, something that is almost unthinkable, or will Brian Kelly's Tigers lay down a marker by overcoming their Week 1 demons and stamping down a statement non-conference victory???
The answer lies in two places:
The trenches & special teams.
If LSU handle their business along each line, also minimizing any and all special teams errors (as a neck and neck race for the #1 punter job shakily unfolds between an underperforming Peyton Todd & unproven veteran Blake Ochsendorf), while holding an advantage along the offensive line, at skill positions, linebacker, and quarterback, on paper LSU should start off their 2024 adventure with a critical win.
Still...anything can happen in college football & due to some glaring defensive deficiencies that may need a game or two of adjustments to fix, due to the overall youthful age of LSU's players, the Tigers vs the Trojans could fast become a bloodbath in the Nevada desert....all the chips shoved into the middle of the table by both coaches.
USC possess some weapons that could hurt LSU, such as WR Zach Branch. Although he's shown some strong indications of aerial oneupsmanship, Branch only recorded 320 yards, 31 catches, and 2 TDs last year....respectable numbers for a big name freshman in the SEC....not the former Pac 12 so much.
For all the plaudits & expectations his way, Branch still hasn't produced on the big stage, let alone against an SEC defense.
That said, some of the hot & cold coverage we've witnessed from LSU's secondary should leave Corey Raymond's unit susceptible to at least a few coverage busts, even snaps plagued by miscommunication at the backend during these early days of Raymond and Jake Olsen's "DBU rebranding".
Which Tiger corner will line up on Branch, or.......will LSU DBs finally be able to prevent receivers, as well as tight ends, from making routine plays on crossing or slant routes???
Over the past 4 opening weekend defeats, LSU's defensive backs were shredded by these simple, yet effectively run "over the middle" passing plays....and while we've seen LSU corners and safeties step up & make plays throughout camp, the fact remains.....even our best cover corner, sophomore Ashton Stamps, displays a propensity to get burned over the middle on these inside routes.
It may be from these expected aerial gains where USC's points arrive....but will Corey Raymond's DBU Redux be able to make adjustments & turn things back in their favor?
No doubting the practices against LSU's endless deployment of receiving talents will have helped DBU 2024 shape up after an atrocious rock bottom last fall.
But under new(er) management, we should witness Raymond pulling out aces from up his sleeve to clamp down on Lincoln Riley's high intensity short passing attack, at the least unwilling to take major gains lying down as Matt House & Bo Pelini were all too willing to allow.
.....we've already seen some DBs take major strides forward since Coach Raymond's return (PJ Woodland, Jordan Allen, Jardin Glbert, DeSean Spears, and Ashton Stamps), yet we need to see Sage Ryan, Javien Toviano & Zy Alexander take that next step during the 2nd half of Fall Camp.
Elsewhere, USC also boast a pair of top offensive linemen, the heralded Jonah Monheim and Emmanuel Pregnon.
Monheim & Pregnon, like Campbell & Jones (just nowhere near as good), stand as two future NFL prospects, however, the USC OL tandem will have their work cut out for them when facing off against the hellfire of Bo Davis' hungry, disrespected D-Line and versatile violence from Kevin Peoples' high pedigree edge rushers.
Against Bo Davis and Peoples' front attack, adding Harold Perkins into the mix, Pregnon & Monheim will take on one of the more talented defensive units they'll face all season in what should be an enticing battle royale. Although, it may just expose a key area for Tigers' defensive coordinator Blake Baker to attack: USC's weaker interior offensive line.
If Gio Paez, Jacobian Guillory, Paris Shand, Shone Washington, Jay'viar Suggs, etc can get a push up front, opening lanes for Perkins, Weeks or Burns on blitzes through the middle gaps, or creating leverage for edge rushers Saivion Jones, Bradyn Swinson, Dashawn Womack, Dylan Carpenter, Gabe Reliford etc to wreak havoc from the flanks, it could be a very long night for USC and the perfect prescription to aid LSU's still-in-progress secondary.
Overall, the game plan from Head Coach Brian Kelly should be predicated on bullying USC's one dimensional defensive front with Brad Davis' athletic, overpowering, veteran offensive line, 4 of whom stand to be drafted in the first 3 rounds of the 2025 NFL Draft;
On defense, Baker must find pathways to the quarterback for Perkins, Swinson, Womack, Jones, and Gabe Reliford among others, giving Corey Raymond's "still in progress" secondary much needed assistance.
If LSU's special teams remain error free, the defense minimizes big plays & creates a turnover or two, Brad Davis' offensive line dictates the tempo, quickly wearing down USC's best defenders, while Co-Offensive Coordinators Cortez Hankton and Joe Sloan call upon their army of varying athletic specimen at RB, WR, and TE, led by a steady, steely-eyed, turnover-free Garrett Nussmeier, surely the Tigers will possess far too much firepower for the Trojans to handle.
Regardless of the success I believe LSU will have on this opening Sunday night bout, anything can happen during these games....especially these cursed openers for the Tigers.
We've seen it all....from defending national champions getting destroyed by KJ Costello in front of an aghast home crowd, to Malik Nabers fumbling not one, but two punts in the same game, a blocked PAT (with triple zeroes on the clock) that would've sent that same contest to overtime, Jayden Daniels' historic 2023 offense shut down by an ACC school, UCLA's Pac 12 roster & "sissy powder blue" uniforms making LSU's 2021 defense, full of NFL Pro Bowl talent, play like kindergarten-aged kids run amok....
To avoid every single pitfall from before, 2024 LSU must also move on from that crooked past....this is a new team, a new season, a new vibe, yet at the same time, these are the same mistakes resurfacing, the same lessons unlearned, identical scenarios playing out like a deja vu mind hex year after year.....
Which is why an eternal balance must be found by Brian Kelly in the lead up to this all important opener as well as the subsequent next 12+ games....from the ball control game plan to diverse, exotic play selection, or even LSU's stoic psychological preparation, everything must be balanced.
....it will be sticky, there will be frustrating moments, errors, uncomfortable stretches, but if LSU can thrive on the pressure, fight through moments of suffering & deliver a complete, measured, aggressive performance, a mentality ushered on by their quarterback, dictating the terms to USC early and often, then I sense LSU will not even require a dominant exhibition of force for victory....just a full 4 quarters of kick ass LSU football will be more than enough.
PREDICTION
LSU 38
USC 28
NUSS: 334 Yards, 3 TDs
HILTON JR: 93 Yards, 1 TD, 5 catches
JACKSON: 117 Yards, 18 carries, 1 TD
TAYLOR: 102 Yards, 7 Catches, 1 TD
EMERY JR: 77 Total Yards, 1 receiving TD
PERKINS: 8 Tackles, 1 FF, 1 Sack, 1.5 TFLs
JONES: 1.5 Sacks, 2.5 TFLs
SWINSON: 1 Sack, 1.5 TFLs, 1 PBU
ALLEN: 1 INT
RYAN: 1 FR, 2 PBUs
By LONN PHILLIPS SULLIVAN
©️ 2024 Uninterrupted Writings Inc
Great metaphors, imagery, analysis, and humor all of which bring us an entertaining and insightful look at the package we fans will gleefully get to open in a few short weeks. Thanks Lonn. I, like you, hope for a special team performance that is so solid, we almost don’t notice them.
Lonn, this was great!! I read it as if you were in the same room as me telling me. You have so much talent!